I hear what you're saying: "Girlfriend? Like a human one?"
I'm shocked too, because apparently a gamer in Germany wanted to game so hard that he drugged his girlfriend so she wouldn't bother him during his session. According to Gawker, who obviously have staff who can translate the original news report, the man confessed to putting "four or five drops" in her tea. Not so he could sexually assault her, but so he could focus on his virtual task at hand.
If you're about to raid, females can be the deadliest distraction.
Sadly for the man, the judge didn't understand the 'lifestyle', so handed him an assualt conviction and a 500 Euro fine. “Your girlfriend slept long and deeply, which didn’t harm her, but this is certainly a premeditated bodily harm,” the judge said. The couple have since broken up. Of course the real question here is how a man like this could even get a girlfriend in the first place. It must really bum you out if you're good looking, sociable, don't play video games, and single.
Luckily for the ladies of Germany, the only thing the guy will be cuddling from now on is a waifu pillow.