I am eternally indebted to a pal for alerting me to this video after he shared it on Facebook. In terms of human endeavour, it's up there with that Korean gymnast what broke his leg at the Olympics but carried on so his teammates wouldn't be bummed out. My life is infinitely better for watching it.
The video features an intrepid stoner hitting 25 dabs in a row. For those who don't know, dabs are a super-concentrated form of hash which is extracted in a process involving bhutane. If that description isn't quite correct then please, for the love of God, don't let me know. I couldn't care less. All we really need to know is that dabs are pretty crack-y and they get you high as balls.
The guy in the video is YouTube user CustomGrow420. He is also a superhuman. He starts the video in good spirits, and he even seems almost ok at the halfway mark. Alarm bells only start to ring when a large bit of snot starts to drip from his nose during another hit. His body is literally trying to expel this super-grade resin from whatever orifice isn't blocked by a custom pipe:
At this point our garrulous host starts to have a really bad time. I imagine his excessive cough isn't too dissimilar to the sort heard in the trenches at Reims. If you removed the video, I'm sure it would sound like a man dying amidst chemical warfare.
But this is a dude with 'SUCCESS' written on his top. You don't rock that slogan if you're unprepared to live for it - just ask his 527K (!) followers. He soldiers on.
Now I just feel bad for the guy. Surely the reason you do any drug is to derive some sort of pleasure from it. CustomGrower420 looks like he's drowning in his own bodily fluids. This is all a bit of a bummer. I've taken the above screengrab with four minutes still remaining. Surely he won't last?
As an aside, let me draw your attention to the ring on his left hand. It appears this man is married. If you're still single with no lover in sight, ask yourself this simple question: Have you ever attempted 25 dabs in a row?
Because few things are more attractive than success and a willingness to go after it. Here he is, 25 dabs down:
Next time you're thinking about throwing in the towel, remember our dab hero.
25 not out.
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