PECKHAM TERMINATOR

Peckham Terminator
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PECKHAM TERMINATOR



Written by Sarah Dixon
05 Thursday 05th August 2010

 

Commuters on a London bus were terrorised today by a camp white kid, AKA the Peckham Terminator. The fact that PT (Peckham Terminator) is possibly the least frightening individual roaming the planet has delighted watchers of the YouTube footage.
 
 

 

 

However, what is perhaps most interesting about the Peckham Terminator incident is the opportunity it gives us to analyse a precariously balanced and delicate social experiment. In true physics-homework style we present to you – The Peckham Terminator: A study in Social and Racial Cohesion in South East London.
 
The Setting:
Our experiment takes place in Peckham, 2010, ten years after Damilola Taylor, 10, was stabbed walking home from Peckham library. Considered one of the roughest boroughs in South London this place once had it all; gun crime, knife crime, and troubled youths. Our test-tube is the common double-decker bus. Seen regularly across London, the double-decker is a place of careful social etiquettes rarely seen elsewhere on London Transport.
 
The Chemical Components:
In the back of the bus we have a young black woman. She’s talking to her friend about how black sprinters will win all the medals at the Olympics (fair comment, probably true). At the front of the bus we have Mr PT (as yet unnamed), he becomes enraged by these comments. Finally we have twat one and twat two, they’re the ones videoing the whole episode. They’re of the happy-slapping generation who love to catch the sorrows of modern life on five mega pixel camera phones and post them onto YouTube. The only thing sadder than the fact they’re filming this breakdown, is the fact you’re watching it, and regrettably, that I’m writing this analysis.
 
The Results:
PT flips out and challenges YBG (Young Black Girl) to a fight. Trapped in the bus he demonstrates that doors and walls are no match for the Peckham Terminator. Despite it being obvious that the front doors are open, PT smashes his way through the bus door and walks unharmed down the street, never to be seen again.
 
The Analysis:
This experiment seems to throw up more questions than it answers:
 
  • This was in Peckham, why isn’t this guy dead, stabbed or shot yet?
  • I thought sitting on the top deck of the bus was the dangerous one, time to re-evaluate the advice we give to youngsters.
  • What the hell was the driver doing? Careful analysis reveals that he does sweet FA.
  • Why is no-one calling the police?
  • And did he just walk through a glass door unharmed?
  • Finally – where the fuck is our bus?
 
Conclusion:
  1. Peckham is not as badass as you think
  2. If you feel like having a public meltdown on a busy London bus – feel free – it seems as if no-one will do anything about it and you may become a YouTube hit – sign of a tolerant society, or just that we truly live in an age of idiocy?
  3. If you see the PT ask him how he got through that door.
  4. If you’re that kid laughing at the end, then you are a true embarrassment. 

 

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Comments

  • Guest: aidan.knight47
    Sun 07 - Aug - 2011, 09:54
    It ain't a black girl he's challenging to a fight, it's a dude
  • Guest: constricto
    Sun 08 - Aug - 2010, 11:12
    But go on..admit it, you loved it really. :)
  • Guest: splodge
    Thu 05 - Aug - 2010, 17:22
    un-f****** believable!

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