THE 9 TYPES OF HIPSTER YOU SEE IN LONDON

The 9 Types Of Hipster You See In London
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THE 9 TYPES OF HIPSTER YOU SEE IN LONDON



Written by Jack Blocker
23 Tuesday 23rd April 2013

Those fail WTF ?! glasses

Check this a-hole getting kissed by a chick who is a stone-cold 10 from the side who he will probably have sex with later: He doesn't even need those glasses. What a loser.

Dressing like Batman #win!? or #fail

Check this dummy dressing like my favourite super hero and getting paid to do so. I dress like batman and stare aimlessly into the distance all the time but no-one pays me. And that's why hipsters suck.

Why do they sit on pavements!? OMG #why

Maybe this nerd has come from one of those parties where you do a shit-load of weird drugs off a cracked iPhone screen, have some fucked-up 3-way, and end up confused and pants-shitted on the street at 10 am on a Thursday. Or maybe not. Like the Buzzfeed editor, my fun involves better activities:

Huey Lewis #win #trashy #OMG #justsayno

Why do they drink out of jars!? #!?

I would never attend a party where obscenely attractive women who don't listen to Huey Lewis and the News get drunk and horny on cocktails served in a jar. I would rather cut my dick off. 

Why do they dress funny? LOL

It's so stupid the way a lot of people dress like me, but then some people dress differently from me. WTF!?

They think women find their facial hair attractive

I CALL B***SHIT. These chicks obvs don't find this guy attractive, he's hired them with all the money he makes being a hipster.

What's with the hard hitting statements? #whatswiththehardhittingstatementsOMG

I won't ask her. The doorman wouldn't let me and Luke in.

What's with the sunglasses indoors?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I bet he wears his clothes in the shower which he also uses to get more dirty in a house that actually lives inside him LOL #oppositeGIFs

Why do they keep pets as accessories?

Why does this horrible hipster keep his shar-pei as a handbag even though it's alive and he's a man. I bet he'll punt the poor thing off a bridge as he walks home high on drugs with Luke Lewis following him to ask if he can be his mate. 

trashy @JackBlocker

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Comments

  • Guest: brown.christopher
    Thu 25 - Apr - 2013, 20:16
    Jack Blocker a blogger writing about 'Hipsters'....twat

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