16 Wednesday 16th July 2014
Right now I'm kicking myself at having missed this opportunity. I keep thinking of all the time I've wasted. Those late nights with my friends, every pint I drank, every joke I told, the time I kissed that girl I really fancied, all the sunsets that crested the horizon telling us to go home, bleary-eyed and gorgeous after another lost night of our lives.
I could've done all of that shit anyway. I just needed to spend five minutes beforehand sketching a dustpan with a hole in the end and then become a millionaire. Mind you, larger bits of debris wouldn't fit throught the funnell.
Buy this wonderful bastard here.
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