3 PEOPLE WHO SHOULD BE KIM JONG-UN'S BEST FRIENDS

3 People Who Should Be Kim Jong-Un's Best Friends
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3 PEOPLE WHO SHOULD BE KIM JONG-UN'S BEST FRIENDS



Written by Dont Panic
26 Wednesday 26th April 2017

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Like Gordon Brown and Shakira or Vladimir Putin and Fred Durst, Kim Jong-un and Dennis Rodman are a wonderfully bizarre politician-celebrity power couple. Former basketball player Rodman initially met the leader of the pariah state in February 2013, visting alongside other sportsmen and a documentary crew in a diplomatic gesture; Jong-un is a lifelong Chicago Bulls fan, a team Rodman played for, and idolised Michael Jordan as a child.

Following the trip, Rodman visited North Korea a further six times and came to regard Jong-un as a true friend, but their relationship seems to have come to a standstill as of late. Both men have been fairly busy lately, to put it lightly. Even so, we all need friends to tell us when we're going wrong every now and then- particularly when you're nuclear armed. Here's our picks for who could fill Rodman's size 14 shoes...

Patsy From Absolutely Fabulous

Like his father Kim Jong-il - whose expenses on goods ranging from cognac to luxury cars took up 20% of North Korea's national budget - Jong-un has a taste for luxury. He imports Yves Saint Laurent cigarettes, sails in a $7 million, 100-foot long yacht designed by Fendi and has a fleet of over 100 cars at his disposal. A fitting companion for the despot would be Patsy Stone from Absolutely Fabulous; she too loves to smoke heavily, quaff champagne and has the cruel mindset of someone who'd condemn millions to poverty. But while Patsy infamously hasn't eaten anything since 1973, Jong-un enjoys Danish pork, Thai mangoes and Iranian caviar. Also, for those of you saying 'she's a fictional character, doesn't work'- pfft, there's nothing the Chairman of the Workers’ Party of Korea, Chairman of the DPRK State Affairs Commission, Supreme Commander of the Korean People’s Army and Supreme Leader Of Our Party, Nation and Military can't do. 

Click through to see who else we think is a good match...


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