The Shock Of The New!


Written by Robert Foster
29 Monday 29th April 2013

Nothing's getting worse, culture's progressing like it always has, either join the conversation or look like a grumpy stick-in-the-mud who hates fun. In fact, there's two things in particular where if you're complaining about them and you're under 45, you're doing life wrong. First is hipsters: you hate hipsters? You mean you hate young people who like new things, weird clothes and fun parties? Um, I've got news for you, that's youth culture, and that's what it's always been like. If you're so much better than everyone else in your generation, why aren't you being invited to those parties and being asked your opinions on things by people that actually shape culture? Maybe because you're a huge downer to hang out with and your opinions are actually the pretty orthodox ramblings of someone who doesn't realise they just don't get it? I can't tell for sure.

The other thing it's a waste of your fucking time to complain about is technology. Oh, you miss the days where you had to buy magazines in real life? That's nice, remember how if they were sold out, you just couldn't find stuff out? You miss fanzine culture? I used to make a fanzine, I distributed it to 50/60 people at punk shows in Aldershot back in 1999, it cost me 30 quid in photocopying bills and it took ages to put together, now my free Tumblr has three times as many followers than my zine ever reached, including four followers who live in Chile. This isn't rocket science, is it?

People even claim to dislike mobile phones, but to paraphrase a Russell Brand (sorry) bit, remember when someone had to cancel on you when you were meeting them, and you just had to wait for hours hoping they'd turn up, then give up and go home, tail between your legs like at the end of The Incredible Hulk? That was so shitty. And now we have cameras on videos on our phones- some people use them to take photos of food, so what? Imagine how lovely it's going to be when you're 80 and lots of your friends are dead and you have 100000000x more photos of your youth to look at than your parent's generation did. 

Why am I bringing up phones? Well, HTC gave us money to feature their new phone on our site, and people might see that as a symptom of a time where people like us who are involved with things like this are easily bought- but whatever, we've got more money to get more things like this on Channel 4, so what's the beef?

Plus also, the phone is sick, the camera's some new deal that's blowing people's minds, the speakers are actually loud, BlinkFeed sounds like a good idea and it gave me an excuse to grind my personal axe at you all. It was either that or make fun the dorks who make unboxing videos

PS How annoyed would these anarchists be if they knew that I included their picture in what's essentially a phone advert? Oops.


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  • Guest: nemo
    Wed 15 - May - 2013, 15:57
    I'm quite with you on most of this, but if you believe kids with no money or access to shops couldn't listen to music, because of vinyl! ... Well. It's true I couldn't afford any vinyl back when, I had three records or somesuch, but I was listening to music all the time (not only those tree), because, you know, friends? radio? parents? clubs? tapes? parties? What I also had was three vinyl records I loved to death and still do.